acid tongue

clothobuerocracy:

sunshineface0014:

ridge:

it’s weird how people talk bad about strippers but no one says anything about the people who go to see them

!!!!!!!!!

Who’s worse? The woman who dances on a pole making $600 a day or the man stepping out on his wife and family to throw singles at a complete stranger?


bootygrooty:

deelekgolo:

I’m still fucked up at the fact that the longest piece of English fictional literature written by any human is a super smash bros brawl fan fic.

218 chapters
3.5 million words
AND ITS STILL IN PROGRESS


lieutenantstilinski:

edenidoigo:

whalegod:

tell me a secret

One time during class my drama/english teacher, who’s a devout vegan and all about not killing animals, accidentally stepped on a ladybug. He froze up and slowly cradles it in his hand and he was so heartbroken and started quoting Hamlet.

I didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was a red m&m.

I can’t breathe


theanimejunkie:

bossubossupromode:

Two students, James and John were given a grammar test by their teacher. The question was, “is it better to use “had” or “had had” in this example sentence?”

The teacher collected the tests, and looked over their answers.

James, while John had had “had”, had had “had had.” “Had had” had had a better effect on the teacher.

welcome to the english language


inlikewithlife:

chaotic-awesome:

I Don’t Know How Much Vodka I Put In This But I’m Going To Drink It Anyways: a memoir

This drink tastes awful, but I can’t waste alcohol: a sequel


i told them that i was
dying

but i made it sound like poetry

so they laughed with their
pretty teeth and
didn’t
believe.

- (via hassphalt)

(Source: inkskinned)


From 18 to 22 you meet a lot of temporary people.
- (via rhymez)

(Source: mydeepest-fear)


angrychickpea:

i find it funny that “i like big butts” has always been a well-liked song, but as soon as Nicki Minaj samples it and shows off her amazing ass in a video, suddenly OH MY GOD WHAT A SLUT PUT THAT AWAY

like, it’s okay for a guy to talk about how much he loves butts
but it’s not okay for women to love their own butts

funny how that works

(Source: )


You’re the only person I loved on Mondays and I fucking hated everyone on Mondays.
- you (via frenchbreadrecovery)